It happens to all of us. There's nothing to eat in the house except a mishmash of dubious leftovers and condiments. You don't have the ingredients you need. You get creative when you don't have time or distracted when you shouldn't. The result sometimes shows up on social media, maybe because you shared it or maybe because @cookingforbae somehow got their hands on it. Instragram is a treasure trove of food porn, filled with mouth-watering snapshots of food styled beautifully ... but then there's the other side of the coin. The #foodfails. The #struggleplates. The results of #cookingforbaeday. This stuff.
1. This Poor, Sad Excuse for a Pizza Will Make Your Soul Weep
I mean, it looks like it would have been pretty delicious. It has black olives and everything. Will you join me in a moment of silence for this pizza?
I get the idea behind what's happening here, but the execution just ... this did not end well.
3. Panini? How about Pa-no-no?
To be honest, though, it probably tastes way better than it looks.
4. American Cheese Makes Everything Better … Right?
The answer is "no, it does not."
5. I'm Sorry, I Have No Idea What This is
Do you? Does anybody know what this is? Maybe rice, maybe eggs, maybe … what IS that?
6. Just Because Things Taste Good Separately...
...does not mean they will taste good together. What bothers me most, I think, is the cheese directly in the milk.
7. This Hamburger Needs a GoFundMe
And I feel bad for it. I think honestly it's more a case of presentation, but remember, stalkers, we eat with our eyes first. (I myself am not allowed to say that, however, since I almost served my wife beautifully under-cooked chicken once.)
8. Someone is Going to Have to Eat a Lot of … This
I have to say, though, that if you nix the cheese and the cold cuts, this would actually look really delicious.
9. That's Not How Gumbo Works...
That's not how gumbo works AT ALL.
10. Bacon Improves Everything … Theoretically
Maybe not corn, though. Like, probably definitely not corn.
11. Have a Big Plate of NOPE
Nope. Nope, nope, nope. This is probably delicious, but also, it is a turkey that has been stuffed with crab legs and octopus. It looks like it is going to attack anyone who approaches it with a fork and I think it should be killed with fire. It looks like a damn spiderkey.
12. This is Just Sad
All the little goldfish look so, so sad.
13. Not Technically Dinner...
More like a snack. A snack that, like the previous goldfish, should make you very sad. That's popcorn, by the way.
14. I Give This a B
For “burnt.” Get it?
15. These Poor Cheetos
Except now, to be honest, I kind of want a tuna-salad-and-Cheetos sandwich.
16. These Are Fancy Hot Dogs, Though
I mean, I might try these. @eastvanj's caption is the best part:
“Appetitizer: deconstructed seared beef offal sausage topped with tomato vinaigrette, mustard seed extract and a cream composed of emulsified egg yolks, plated with a side of pickled garden cucumber chutney. #plating #IforgotIdidnthavehotdogbuns #struggleplate”
17. This is Actually a Classic Combo
I'm serious, I have legitimately eaten this for dinner and loved it. Canned string beans, tho.
Oh, honey, no …
19. You Know What?
Not everyone is destined to be a cook, and that is totally okay. Look at this, though. Look at the cookies. Whoever made this tried so hard!
20. Sometimes Life Gets in the Way
So you serve up some Kraft and fried bologna, and there is nothing wrong with that because fried bologna is delicious.